Yeah, this is still happening, people. I’m still going to do a dramatic reading of Moviebob’s entire, er, magnum opus. This is the mildest, most readable part of the book so…just gird your loins for the next section.

The section contained within this video is not the part that is the most, ahem, demonstrative in how to live your life—that’s the next section. Nonetheless, this section is actually a halfway decent history of the Super Mario Brothers franchise, so I suppose it might be worth listening to.

As for why I’m reviewing this book now: I only managed to get my hands on it recently, and having read it, I’m simultaneously sad and happy that I did: Sad because this book peaks at “mediocrity” and averages at “slightly disturbing”, and happy because it is-in a way-relevant to all men: This book is like a guide of how NOT to live your life, and should be given to aspiring NEETs as a way to psychologically slap them. So numerous are the books problems that I have to do what none of my other reviews on this site have done, and split it with subheadings.

After the dedication page proclaims that Shigeru Miyamoto saved Bob’s life “multiple times” (setting the tone of the book), the book is split into four sections: A brief history of the Mario franchise, Bob’s strange relationship with the game (or his life in the Mushroom Kingdom), an overview of the game itself, and finally a step by step journey through every level and world of the game.

The book has a few recurring problems: The first is that he has a strange writing style that is written as if he’s having a conversation with the reader: “Is this game the most important one in the franchise? No” (p. 9) “A piranha plant that spits fireballs? Madness! (p. 87). While to an extent it is amusing to imagine this book as a man talking to himself about nonsense, it gets old fast.

Score:

6th Symphony (Pastoral) by Ludwig van Beethoven
Adagio in B Flat by Antonio Salieri
Jupiter from The Planets by Gustav Holst

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