In which I shatter the turgid fantasies of those dreaming about “muh foreign women”. It’s what the title says: if you can’t get laid in America, you won’t get laid elsewhere. An audio reading/enhancement of my most controversial Return of Kings article—with some new content added as well.

In fact, I’ll go a step further—if the woman you’re currently seeing has such a hysterical reaction and adamantly refuses to bake you cookies or whatever, maybe *you’re* the problem.

“But the women in Russia/Brazil/Thailand/wherever are more likely to cook for me! Their culture hasn’t been corrupted by feminism!!” you’re probably saying to yourself. And I’m sure to some extent that’s true, but again, if you’re the sort of person that goes around saying “all women are like ‘that’, all women are like ‘that” with regards to female “hypergamy” and “lusting after Chad” and all the other incomprehensible dorky codewords that keyboard alpha males do then shouldn’t it also follow, logically, that most women are also “like that” when it comes to wanting to submit to a strong yet gentle patriarchy—if you can provide it?

In other words, why are women “purely emotional hamsters” when it comes to lusting after Chad—and I am going to ignore how the angry beta males are probably themselves lusting after Chad—but suddenly they become shrewd and business-like when it comes to not choosing your stupid ass to fall in love with?

Personally, I do indeed think that women and men both have biological imperatives that the overwhelming majority would follow if given the choice, and I will always maintain that if a woman sees you as a strong and masculine “alpha male”, she will want to be “barefoot and pregnant in the kitchen” strictly for you, not anybody else, just the man she has eyes for.

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