(Excuse the delay, my roommate’s pet rabbit chewed through our ethernet cord).

Multitasking is a term that we hear a lot of nowadays: there’s plenty of websites and publications that purport to teach you how to multitask, this mythical activity, and occasionally you’ll read some article on how millennials are inherently better at multitasking than older generations—in a desperate attempt to find anything positive to say about my almost entirely worthless generation.

Sarcasm aside, I do find that multitasking is very useful for the simple fact that, hey, getting the maximum amount of shit done in your day is a good thing—it’s rewarding, and it leaves your slate blank for the next day!

However, many people will try to “multitask” incorrectly: which is to say that they will do two activities simultaneously that requires the same appendage or mental process. Thus, rather than getting two tasks done, they’ll just half-ass two activities simultaneously and ultimately not save any time or effort.

As somebody who works three paying jobs (personal trainer/martial arts instructor, music teacher, freelance writer/internet personality) that each require a lot of continuous effort (training, practicing, reading, editing video, etc.), some of my less adroit peers ask me how I am capable of doing all of this AND more or less keep abreast of the news and popular culture.

The easiest answer to this is that I’m not a particularly social person, and thus when other people are going out drinking mediocre beer and dancing to even worse music, I’m busting my ass. But the answer that is relevant to this article is that I have mastered the art of multitasking effectively.

The Key

“What is the key to effective multitasking?” you might be asking now. From my experience, that key is: to “do things while not doing things”. That probably doesn’t make sense to you, so let me put it to you with a hypothetical: assume that you need to accomplish two tasks. You can do this very easily if one task is active, and one task is passive.

For example, it’s impossible to, say, wash dishes and practice guitar at the same time, you’re just going to do a shitty job of cleaning and a shitty job of playing guitar. However, you can play guitar while catching up on your favorite TV show, or do some reading while you cook dinner, or listen to a podcast as you do some writing, as I did while writing this article. And of course, the passive activity that you do can easily be just as rewarding as the active one: instead of watching the pop cultural flotsam that makes up 99% of televisual programming, perhaps you could watch a documentary, or listen to a book on tape.

Both tasks that you do in multitasking should be enriching your life—taking the slow route to cooking a good meal while reading something substantive (even if you’re just making burgers that’ll take you a good 10-20 minutes, enough time to read a chapter or so) is much better for you (physically AND mentally) then microwaving some crap and reading something that is equally crappy.

Another tenet to think of when multitasking is to not do two tasks that require the same “appendage” or “mental process”, as I stated above. In other words, never try to multitask with two tasks that require you to use your hands—I’ve repeatedly stated this, but it always bears repeating: you won’t accomplish a damn thing.

In contrast, when you master multitasking via different “Appendages”, you’ll be able to do much more than a mere two tasks. For example, you’ll be able to play a musical instrument, watch TV, and take a phone call/dictation for your business/side hustle. Or you’ll be able to work out, read, and arrange your wardrobe. And since being able to juggle multiple tasks effectively can be considered a variation on the old Kim’s Game or awareness training, you can consider that a fourth task. Put a pot of coffee to boil, and holy shit you’ll be doing five things simultaneously!

So, if anybody was wondering how I manage to get so much shit done, there’s your answer: I multitask, but in a way that differs from the stereotype of “running about hectically pouring sweat” that Joe Loser thinks of when he thinks of multitasking. When you understand the concept of accomplishing tasks passively, simultaneously with active tasks, your productivity will increase and you’ll get more stuff done.